Tumhari aankhon se itna to Zahir hai
Ki dil me tumhare muddatein beet gayi hain
Par hamare dil tak uski hawa se ab tak sirf patte hi ud rahe hain
Ab keh bhi do lafzon me
Ki dil se sare armaan ujad rahe hain
Darte ho tum, ye khata hai tumhari
Are puch to lo ek baar
Manenge nahi
Par inkaar bhi nahi kar paenge
Ki thoda sa to ho gaya hai
Ye ishq jo tumse hi to seekha hai
Ki lakh baatein keh jayein aankhein
Majal hai jo zaban se ek lafz bhi nikla hai
Kaho na kaho
Apna kya lena dena
Aaj ho, kal to Zahir hai
Nahi hoge
Aaj samne bitha k ke khamoshi sahi hai
Kal dooriyon me bhi fasla rakhoge
Jitne ho, utna samet liya
Kal ka kya hai
Apna saaman sametenge
Aur sath tumhari yaadein liye
Chal denge…
Ye zindagi itni lambi bhi nahi
Jitni tumhe lagti hai dost
Tum palkein jhukaoge
Aur ye waqt beet jaega
Sapna hi to hai ye bhi
Tum kahoge
To ek aur saj jaega..
Khatam to har kahani ko hona hi hai ek din,
Hamari aaj ho jaye to kya hi ho jaega…
Jo shuru hi nahi hua kabhi
Wo khatam ho jaye
To kya hi farq pad jaega..
Category: pain
A lonely way
It’s a lonely lonely way
To come back to your senses
And see everything for what it is
No sugarcoat
Not one world of delusion
Or even dreams for that matter
Everything clear as a crystal
I cannot decide
What breaks my heart more
To know the truth
Or to know that perhaps
The lies were better
The world I had created in my head was better
It is a welcome feeling
To come back to myself
To who I was and am
In it’s complete glory
But to see
What’s in front of me
And behind me
While I walk
Alone in the hallway
All but none
There but some
None in your pain
All in your joy
A hint of pain
And all of them disappear
They use you
Walk all over you
Pretend to care
Or care to pretend?
Was this actually the fate all along
To feel so empty in bondings
That you find a mate
And settle down
For the life’s suffering will weigh you down
Far too low
Put that fence
On someone’s neck
Rejoice and die in each other’s company
Cz no one else is too be seen
The fall
Pain of that fall still stings
I complain
Complain to myself everyday
You could have been someone
Why are you a nobody ?
Where’s the dream
The little you saw
Where’s the castle
You build with a straw
Where’s the courage that could shake the world
Where are you
I fail to find
Where’s your sword
Where’s your armour
Why do you sit there in the corner
Refusing to see eye to eye
With what have you lost
Why don’t you respect yourself
After all the wars you have fought
Why don’t you count them as a war
Why do you run behind
The one battle you couldn’t win
And might fight someday
Once you regain your strength?
Isn’t a wounded soldier allowed some rest ?
May be the bird will fly again
She has just taken a fall
And might star trying again
But hasn’t she just found peace
She has just found her breath
Let’s wait till we find her pulse
And push her to fly again ?
Our demons
Our demons danced together
and it was better than heaven
Life at its best
even if it’s coloured leaden
Couldn’t have asked for anything else
than for me to be my honest self
to sleep in your arms like a baby
to be warrior for the battle that comes next
Better than the things we deliberately create
Nothing compares to the genuine love and the raw hate
For Gods to dance together in heaven is plain
Oh dear, for the demons of two people
to dance together insane
Fire all around, devoured the world sat
no passion can ever be better than that
Toxic, terrible, poisonous they said
Oh baby that’s my holy grail
for whatever it takes
He pushed me through the cliff
I fall down after
only to find him waiting
at the heaven’s alter
Intensity of death in a moment’s conscience
a thousand times over for a death so bright
Choosing you was not my choice,
losing you wasn’t either
Thankful to you I am, now that we end the plight
How did you know
that the color I was hiding was blue
until I suffered from the same pain as you
No matter where we are my fellow demon
I’ll always love you..
My heart recalls
Bumped upon few of your letters
Even for a moment, felt I was loved just by reading it
cz you might certainly not know but it’s pretty lonely here..
in my heart for the past few years
And frighteningly so but your love still echoes in my heart and I long for it on some days like this..nothing new about it now I’m sure..
Not written for the past few years,
my heart feels empty..
nothing ignites a spark
nothing aches my soul..
what do I write if not letters to you..
the ones you’ll never read..
the ones upon which I’ll be mocked upon to have been stuck on for so long..
What do I write?
As if the only subject of both my affection and words were you for so long..
That I have lost the will to even set my inspiration on someone or something else upon
Too long I recall, to have forgotten everything
But how do I explain that I still long for
Not just the pretty words but the ardent storms you brought in my soul
Not only the smiles and showers of laughter I have borrowed from you
But also the tears of agony you’ve lent me
Written a lot about many other things for a decade
Stuck on you was this poet
After a whirlwind of love, the story we shared..
Written none of you
But all for you
And yet here I stand
Aching to write
A little about me and the world around
And you stand there smiling
As if you are what everything surrounds..
Incomplete as I’m
Incomplete shall this poem remain..
I await you and so the poem awaits..
Ignited is just one flame
Today upon glancing at you
after ages
I wonder if the poet in me loved you more than me
Betrayed I am by you,
By her
Forgotten is love
Forgotten is the entire Avenue..
Alone sits the writer staring at the empty sky
Alone mourns the lover
With no hope in her eyes..
Life isn’t beautiful
Life isn’t beautiful
It’s just darkness all around
You smile for a while
Every time its taken away
You try to be happy
Right beside there sadness lays
You hold it, you lie down
You don’t even consider getting up now
Lying down there is comfortable
Being buried down under is not frightening anymore
You trust, you’re betrayed
You love, you’re heartbroken next
You think life will change
No it won’t
The cost of being strong
Is being hurt every other time
You cry yourself to sleep at night
You bleed without a cut in plight
You get up, you fall down
You thought you were lucky
At the one thing that happened right
Lying behind are a million lies
You told yourself
Things were never so bright
It’s a mirage you’ve created
For the desert of pain won’t let you live
You’re getting closer to it
The myth is broken
The last thread of illusion
you’ve been holding on to
Is now loose
You don’t have the strength
To hold on to it anymore
To see life eye to eye
Is exhausting now
Fighting this battle
Is invain somehow
No sign of victory
No reason to win
It’s just darkness all around
The colour of your love
29th Nov 2020
I wish the colour of your love settles down..
I wish it’s a blank space again
I hope the colour of your love settles down
Cz mine is still a beautiful landscape
I will choose the red the yellow the blue..
I know the colour of my rainbow is overdue..
I hope the colour of your love settles down
I can’t erase it..
The colours have dried…it has faded away..
In a dark room
Polishing it over and over again..
I’m done and it’s dusted..
As the sun shines the next morning..
I hope the colour of your love settles down..
I don’t want someone else to come and colour it..
This time I want to choose the colours myself..
My colours, it’s my Canvas,
It’s high time…you return me my greys..
I’ll cherish the red..
And make it mine all over again..
I hope the colour of your love settles down
It’s high time that I’m myself again..
I refuse to believe
If you can move over the song
That said it feels like heaven with me
May be love is nothing but an illusion
May be we as humans surrender
Only to what’s important
And to the convenience of what we need
If a term like ‘break up’ exists
It can only mean
There is love
But no true love
It is as situational as sleep
And as instinctive as hunger
If change is the only constant
I doubt there was ever an eternal love
No matter how much I want to believe
My love is longer than my life..
And your heart will belong to me forever
I know it isn’t,
I know the need to survive
Is may be greater than all
And love, as natural as it is
As beautiful as it is
Is more of an adornation
A rhetorical metaphor
You fall in love someday,
And someone else a few years later
What is love if it cannot be fought for ?
If it’s not selfishness,
And the helplessness to survive,
That inspires companionship..
What exactly is ?
Is love actually a nature’s trick ?
It’s a timeless question a lover asks,
When being abandoned
What about all the promises you made ?
What about the moments we spent together and thought we’ll be together forever..
God forbid those vows be broken,
But if they can be,
Whether easily or in agony
Pardon do I ask,
But I doubt on the existence of love
If it thus be broken so easily
In the presence of fear
Or a blissful empathy
I refuse to believe that love exists..
If life be this complicated
And love comes so easy
Rebukes on the existence of it,
Rebukes on the irony of it..
—If an argument be,
It’s real we all can feel it.
Universal in its nature,
No one can deny it exists.
Then I might be forced to think
If we have bent love too as a concept that suits only it’s exploitation ?
Exactly what we did to all other things..—
While using everything to our advantage,
When the greed exceeds the need
I guess, the quality of everything deteriorates
And love in this case
Might be the culprit, might be the victim too..
And again as we can only question It’s existence
Like we do of God..
I guess like in tough times,
She is the only one we remember.
Even if don’t believe in it..
So we remember love,
When we are in the most need of it..
But no matter how much you are..
In anger or in agony,
And question the existence of love
Or life or the truthfulness of the person in question,
For a brief amount of time,
When you remember their name and your heart skips a beat..
No matter how much you deny,
That was love in all it’s might
You were in love inspite of all the fright
And that was all you knew love to be..
Time passes, life grows old..
You will someday run out of time..
But never of love..
And that’s what will support,
All the fallacies you refuse to believe in
Denial or acceptance
Belief or refusal..
You surrender..
And like the rain
Quenches the fiery fire,
Your questions are only the fumes that arise..
Helpless you kneal down,
Clueless you sit
And stare at it raining
May be you’ll never know if it exists or not
But you wonder..
You can only wonder…
That may be Love is not what ceases to exist,
It’s your belief that does..
And no matter how much you question
That was all you knew love to be…
The finer taste of Life 