It’s a lonely lonely way
To come back to your senses
And see everything for what it is
No sugarcoat
Not one world of delusion
Or even dreams for that matter
Everything clear as a crystal
I cannot decide
What breaks my heart more
To know the truth
Or to know that perhaps
The lies were better
The world I had created in my head was better
It is a welcome feeling
To come back to myself
To who I was and am
In it’s complete glory
But to see
What’s in front of me
And behind me
While I walk
Alone in the hallway
All but none
There but some
None in your pain
All in your joy
A hint of pain
And all of them disappear
They use you
Walk all over you
Pretend to care
Or care to pretend?
Was this actually the fate all along
To feel so empty in bondings
That you find a mate
And settle down
For the life’s suffering will weigh you down
Far too low
Put that fence
On someone’s neck
Rejoice and die in each other’s company
Cz no one else is too be seen
Tag: growing up
Life isn’t beautiful
Life isn’t beautiful
It’s just darkness all around
You smile for a while
Every time its taken away
You try to be happy
Right beside there sadness lays
You hold it, you lie down
You don’t even consider getting up now
Lying down there is comfortable
Being buried down under is not frightening anymore
You trust, you’re betrayed
You love, you’re heartbroken next
You think life will change
No it won’t
The cost of being strong
Is being hurt every other time
You cry yourself to sleep at night
You bleed without a cut in plight
You get up, you fall down
You thought you were lucky
At the one thing that happened right
Lying behind are a million lies
You told yourself
Things were never so bright
It’s a mirage you’ve created
For the desert of pain won’t let you live
You’re getting closer to it
The myth is broken
The last thread of illusion
you’ve been holding on to
Is now loose
You don’t have the strength
To hold on to it anymore
To see life eye to eye
Is exhausting now
Fighting this battle
Is invain somehow
No sign of victory
No reason to win
It’s just darkness all around
I refuse to believe
If you can move over the song
That said it feels like heaven with me
May be love is nothing but an illusion
May be we as humans surrender
Only to what’s important
And to the convenience of what we need
If a term like ‘break up’ exists
It can only mean
There is love
But no true love
It is as situational as sleep
And as instinctive as hunger
If change is the only constant
I doubt there was ever an eternal love
No matter how much I want to believe
My love is longer than my life..
And your heart will belong to me forever
I know it isn’t,
I know the need to survive
Is may be greater than all
And love, as natural as it is
As beautiful as it is
Is more of an adornation
A rhetorical metaphor
You fall in love someday,
And someone else a few years later
What is love if it cannot be fought for ?
If it’s not selfishness,
And the helplessness to survive,
That inspires companionship..
What exactly is ?
Is love actually a nature’s trick ?
It’s a timeless question a lover asks,
When being abandoned
What about all the promises you made ?
What about the moments we spent together and thought we’ll be together forever..
God forbid those vows be broken,
But if they can be,
Whether easily or in agony
Pardon do I ask,
But I doubt on the existence of love
If it thus be broken so easily
In the presence of fear
Or a blissful empathy
I refuse to believe that love exists..
If life be this complicated
And love comes so easy
Rebukes on the existence of it,
Rebukes on the irony of it..
—If an argument be,
It’s real we all can feel it.
Universal in its nature,
No one can deny it exists.
Then I might be forced to think
If we have bent love too as a concept that suits only it’s exploitation ?
Exactly what we did to all other things..—
While using everything to our advantage,
When the greed exceeds the need
I guess, the quality of everything deteriorates
And love in this case
Might be the culprit, might be the victim too..
And again as we can only question It’s existence
Like we do of God..
I guess like in tough times,
She is the only one we remember.
Even if don’t believe in it..
So we remember love,
When we are in the most need of it..
But no matter how much you are..
In anger or in agony,
And question the existence of love
Or life or the truthfulness of the person in question,
For a brief amount of time,
When you remember their name and your heart skips a beat..
No matter how much you deny,
That was love in all it’s might
You were in love inspite of all the fright
And that was all you knew love to be..
Time passes, life grows old..
You will someday run out of time..
But never of love..
And that’s what will support,
All the fallacies you refuse to believe in
Denial or acceptance
Belief or refusal..
You surrender..
And like the rain
Quenches the fiery fire,
Your questions are only the fumes that arise..
Helpless you kneal down,
Clueless you sit
And stare at it raining
May be you’ll never know if it exists or not
But you wonder..
You can only wonder…
That may be Love is not what ceases to exist,
It’s your belief that does..
And no matter how much you question
That was all you knew love to be…
The decade, that defines.
As author Meg Jay writes in her book ‘The defining decade’ that “The twenties are a time when people and personalities are poised for transformation.” I wonder why just 10 years out of an incredibly long life. Why does life has to change entirely only in one single decade ?
You’ll barely start your graduation at the beginning of the decade and come out of it as parents of another full-grown individual. How can this not be scary ?
The earlier part, the first five years are mostly all fun and games, probably the most memorable, where you are living your life at your best and the remaining five seem to be as scary. I mention ‘seem to be’ because not having experienced it yet, I’m no one to cling to and establish it as a fact.
And as much as these ten years feel like a treasure and a lottery ticket, it feels like they are slipping like sand from your hand. The more you try to hold it the more they slip out of it.
This topic, I must say will keep appearing in posts and my writings as I explore it ahead, because this adventurous decade is beyond our control and probably thrilling too for the same reason. Because what is thrill without fear ? And what is life without an adventure ?
The finer taste of Life 